England, Scotland, and Wales

I'm taking just a few minutes to give you an update on what
is happening with me these few days. Two weeks ago I was
invited to be an hononrary chaplain at St. Deiniol's Libary
in Wales October 11-31. It is a world-renowned residential
library that has roots in the Church of Wales of the Anglican
Communion. I get room and board in exchange for celebra-
ting the Eucharist during the week and being in residence
for pastoral concerns. Last Monday, just a few days ago, I
was asked if I could start September 29. I agreed to come
and start my duties on the earlier date.

As a result my life during the last few days has been in
turmoil. Yesterday I moved my stuff up from Holy Island
(where I've been since early June) to storage in St. And-
drews. This afternoon I catch a ride with a Church of Scot-
land colleague to the first of four probationers' residential
conferences that I have to do in the next twelve months in
preparation for transfering my ordination to the Church of
Scotland. On Sunday afternoon I'll return to St. Andrews
for the night. Early on Monday morning I'll travel by train
to the Library in Wales. Then I will have a month to enjoy
the Library in Wales, serve in a pastoral position there,
and do a significant amount of writing that I need to do.

Things are happening so quickly that it has been hard for
me to catch my breath. I realize that I am experiencing a
fair amount of grieving for leaving the people of The Open
Gate, other friends on the island, and the peacefulness, holi-
ness, and beauty that characterizes Holy Island. But I look
forward to getting to know the Church of Scotland as I start
the long final phase of the ordination transfer process this
weekend. Also I am eager to get down to the Library in
Wales to get some serious work done on my thesis. This has
been a special summer and fall for me, some of the best
times in my life.

I have often experienced transitions from one place to
another, but never have I had to go through three tran-
sitions as I am doing within these four days. I have been
keenly aware of the Lord providing for my every need.
I have felt loved, protected, and guided. It's a special time
for me, one that I will treasure in my heart. As I reflect
on these four days I realize that until yesterday I was in
England, that for these next three days I am in Scotland
where I've been for the last four years, and then that Mon-
day I am in Wales for a month. It is an adventure I am
really enjoying.

Blessings to you and yours,

A Little Time Out

Tomorrow I head out on the 'Iona Pilgrimage' for a six day
retreat to engage with the story, people, and present con-
cerns and commitments of the Iona Community. The Iona
Community is in the western islands of Scotland and is a
much larger sister community of the Community of Aidan
and Hilda (CAH), the community that sponsors the Open
Gate Retreat Centre where I've been since early June.
Last week Ray Simpson, one of the leaders of the CAH,
helped to lead a retreat at Iona on contemporary pilgri-
mage. Ray and other leaders thought it was important
that I go on the Iona Pilgrimage. They hoped that my
going would help strengthen the kinship ties between
the two sister communities.

We will spend the first three days, Saturday to Tuesday,
in Dunblane, a town in the central part of Scotland. The
program includes worship in the unique Iona style, becom-
ing familiar with the Wild Goose Resource Group, and hear-
ing about the ecumenical orientation of the Iona Community.
On one of those days we participate in the 'Glasgow Pilgrim-
age' in order to learn about the urban foundation of the Com-
munity. We will spend our last three days on Iona to learn
more about the present work of the Iona Community, its
ministry of healing, and the Community's Rule of Life. I do
not know how many people will take part, but I do know
that we will experience living in community and worship-
ping together. We are also told to expect time for relaxa-
tion and recreation.

I have been feeling a little worn out the past few weeks be-
cause I have stayed on Holy Island longer that I had ex-
pected. It was like I sprinted at the beginning of my time
when I thought I'd be there only six weeks. Only later did
I realize that I needed to run as a long distance runner. It
will be good to enjoy Iona (with Holy Island, one of my fav-
orite places in Britain) and have some time out for a week.
I expect to be refreshed and to continue my volunteering
at The Open Gate.

Blessings to you and yours,

Recently Found on Holy Island: A Supply of Dr. Pepper

Other than finding a stash of Dr. Pepper available for con-
sumption the other day, there really is nothing significant
to report. My routine consists of cleaning toilets, washing
dishes, preparing rooms for guests, leading a couple of
prayer times a week, and being available to people as they
drop by The Open Gate Christian Retreat Centre. God con-
tinues God's slow and steady transformative work in my life.

But here are some observations and thoughts about the last
few weeks:

I noticed one Holy Island resident sipping on a bottle of
Dr. Pepper a week or so ago. I went on a wild search for
the fine drink. My heart was gladdened when I finally
found a sizable supply at a little store in the center of the
village.

As of today I have been volunteering at The Open Gate for
three full months. I expected when I arrived here that I
would be here only six or seven weeks. But now I plan to
be here until October 31 when I move from here to take
up a placement at a Church of Scotland congregation near
St. Andrews.

There's been a significant and constant downpour of rain
the past week. Over on the mainland there has been con-
siderable flooding, but Holy Island has been spared. I don't
remember experiencing such a longterm downpour. Today
we saw a little sun peek out from behind the storm clouds. It
was glorious.

I have enjoyed the many American guests who pass through.
Last week I especially enjoyed a small group of Episcopalians
from St. Paul, Minnesota. I think they left St. Paul at this
time to escape the Republican National Convention in their
fair city last week. I thought they were all right even
though they were Democrats. I made sure that they heard
all the good news coming out of the RNC in their home town.
Yet it was refreshing to have fellow country people with
whom I shared a similar language and cultural cues!

Since I arrived here on Holy Island, England, I have been
receiving a crash course in all things English. I have been
told that I make a great cup of tea for an American. I have
learned that for a proper English cup of tea, milk is poured
before the tea. I do as I am told!

My time here at The Open Gate on Holy Island has been
an extemely meaningful time for me. I had no idea way
back in May that I would even be here. It has been a spe-
cial gift from the Lord to be here far longer than I had ex-
pected. It has been a very special time for me, these last
three months on Holy Island, especially the discovery of
the supply of Dr. Pepper.

Peace and blessings to you and yours,

Aidan: My Role Model

Over thirteen hundred years ago an Irish missionary bish-
op named Aidan walked on Holy Island/Lindisfarne, the is-
land in the northeast tip of England that I have been living
on since early June. His impact was so great that he has
been referred to as the apostle to the English. Last week
Christians from Holy Island, Northumbria (the surround-
ing area) and all over England celebrated St. Aidan's Week.
Numerous events throughout the week bore witness to a
great man of God who loved Jesus and walked in the pow-
er of the Holy Spirit, sharing God's love with whomever he
encountered along the way.

In 635 Aidan was sent out from Iona to found a monastery
and school in this region. He came at the request of his dear
friend Oswald, King of Northumbria, who wanted to share
the Christian faith with the people of his realm. Corman,
the previous missionary who had been sent by Iona, was
stern and hard on the people. His mission failed. Aidan pro-
posed a gentler way of evangelizing, and was sent to re-
place Corman. King Oswald gave him the island of Lindis-
farne as a base for sharing the Christian faith with the
Saxon peoples. The people loved Aidan. They experi-
enced his gentleness, humility, wisdom, compassion, purity,
and concern for the poor and sick. He is especially remem-
bered as a prayer warrior who walked everywhere he went
so he could talk with people along the way. He died August
31, 651.

I am usually at the local parish church most days of the
week for either Morning Prayer or worship. Each time I
pass by the the statue of Aidan that looks upon the ruins
of the medieval abbey. And each day I pray that God
would make me more like Aidan, that my life would be
characterized by a missionary spirit, gentleness, humility,
wisdom, compassion, purity, concern for the poor and the
sick, and a love for people I meet along the way. Lord, make
it come true.

Peace and blessings to you and yours,

More Specifics

On November 1 I will start a twelve month familiarization
placement at Old Cupar, a Church of Scotland congregation
in the town of Cupar, twelve miles south of St. Andrews. I
met with the minister, Rev. Ken Jeffreys, last week and we
had a delightful time. After meeting one another both of us
realized I would be a good fit for the church.

Ken is a Presbyterian from Northern Ireland who has com-
mited himself to renewal and revival of the Church in Scot-
land. Having served as a missionary in Africa he has a heart
for missions. I sense that over the six years he has been the
pastor of Old Cupar the congregation has grown both in num-
ber and community life. They have just finished a building
renovation plan that was tied in with financial support of a
mission in Peru. Ken and his wife are expecting their fourth
child in September and he will be off on paternity leave for
several weeks. Then he'll lead a mission team to Peru in Oc-
tober. That is the reason I won't be starting until November.

I asked the staff of The Open Gate Retreat Centre if I could
continue volunteering until the end of October. I had informed
them in June that I expected to be placed in a church by the
beginning of September. They are happy for me to remain
for the extra two months. Actually I was hoping I could re-
main here longer. There is something about this place that
is so refreshing for me. It has been such a joy and blessing
to be here! I am grateful to God for my unexpected oppor-
tunities on Holy Island/Lindisfarne and at Old Cupar. Truly
I have been blessed!

Blessings to you and yours, and all the best,

Attentiveness

I have now been here at The Open Gate Retreat Centre
on Holy Island, England, for ten weeks. I've washed loads
of dishes and pans, scrubbed a lot of toilets, prepared rooms
for countless guests, and led several dozen Mid-Day and
Evening Prayer chapels. I probably have two or three more
weeks before I head back up to Scotland to work with a min-
ister of the Church of Scotland for twelve months. I have not
received word yet about where I will be headed. I could be
anywhere in Scotland. I have been using a lot of my free
time to prepare to write more for my thesis. I have really
enjoyed having more time to develop my thesis. Soon I
hope to do more writing.

I sense that the Lord has been using my time of volunteer
service here at The Open Gate to form and shape me for
what is ahead of me in Scotland. I have been becoming more
attentive to other people that are our guests at The Open
Gate. It has been a learning experience for me to develop
sensitivity to other people. As a result I have become more
attentive to what is happening in me, especially in regards
to God at work in my life. It has been quite a rewarding ad-
venture for me. The longer I am here on the island, the more
I become attentive to nature: the birds, flowers. grasses, in-
sects, rocks, geological formations, cloud formations, tides,
wind, and rain. It has been an eye opening experience to be-
gin to notice the riches of nature all around me that is such
a treasure of the island. As a result, I have become more at-
tentive to who God is and how God is at work in my life. It
has been a truly blessed time for me here on Holy Island.

Blessings to you and yours,

The God in Nature Holiday Retreat

This Sunday has been a much needed day of rest after a
wonderful God in Nature Holiday Retreat here at the Open
Gate on Holy Island, England. Even though I am a volun-
teer here for the summer, I was involved with the team
that set up a substantial program for the week. I was avail-
able for pastoral care and spiritual direction for the eight
guests participating in the retreat. I served with Graham,
the warden of the Open Gate and co-leader of the retreat;
Carol, the hostess of the Open Gate who made sure every-
body and everything was taken care of; and Paul, who came
from a college in the midlands of England to co-lead the re-
treat with Graham. Paul combines a lively faith in Jesus
with a love and knowledge of nature and a skill in painting.
Our eight guests included people from all over England. It
was a fun group of people!

During the weekdays our pattern was this (everything was
optional): 8:00, Morning Prayer and Communion; 8:40,
Breakfast; 9:45, Morning activity; 12:00, Mid-day Prayer;
12:45, lunch; an afternoon activity; 5:30, Evening Prayer;
6:30, Supper; 7:45, an Evening group time; and 9:00 Night
Prayer. The table conversations at the meals were rich.
Even though I was assigned to do the washing up, my team
members often filled in for me when they saw me engaged
in conversation with one of the guests. I appreciated that!

The whole point of the retreat was to learn to be more at-
tentive to natue in order to become more attentive to God
and to one's self. We marveled at the beauty of nature, drew
closer to God, and enjoyed the presence of one another. God
was definitely present and at work in our lives! Some signifi-
cant healing took place among several of the people on the re-
treat.

There were planned activities that took us out into nature.
We examined the geology of the island; learned about the
flowers, grasses, and plants of the area; explored the coastal
shore of Holy Island; experimented with painting seascapes,
studied how sand dunes are formed; took a boat out to the
Inner Farne Islands to experience their bird paradise; walked
the Pilgrims' Way across the tidal flats (at low tide!); and mar-
velled at the spectacular beauty of St. Abb's Head in Scotland.
We tested one another in our ability to identify birds, flowers,
and geological features. I can only say that I became increas-
ingly attentive to nature, God, and myself as a result of the
retreat. It was wonderful!

Yesterday, Saturday, we said goodbye to new friends and
companions of a special time. But as soon as the last person
left, Graham, Carol, and I began preparing for guests who
would be arriving Saturday afternoon and Sunday. It is nev-
er ending. But we worked hard to make things ready so
that we could rest on Sunday and go to church. It truly has
been a blessed day of rest.

May you have a truly blessed day of rest as well.

Blessings to you and yours,

The State of My Heart

I'm not posting here about my physical heart-it is stronger,
perhaps, than it ever has been. I am referring to my spiri-
tual heart. All is well there, but I sense God is continuing to
do some major work on my heart as the spirtual center of
my life.

Yesterday I returned from a three-day, two-night St. An-
drews visit, my third since I moved down to Holy Island/-
Lindisfarne in early June. I enjoyed catching up with the
plans of several good friends, eating a stack of pancakes at
the North Point, walking by the North Sea, and being intro-
duced to newborn Lawson Ryan Parks, a Colleen and Ryan
production, dear friends from Canada.

As I travelled back by train to Holy Island, I had a strong
sense that my heart longed to be in St. Andrews. Although
I had informed the Church of Scotland that I was open to
serving anywhere in Scotland, I always have felt a strong
pull to St. Andrews. Recently I was informed by the Church
of Scotland that I should expect to be assigned to a church
in St. Andrews for my one year familiarization placement.
I could not imagine anything better. I am looking forward
to moving back up there and starting pastoral ministry in
Scotland. That is where I long to be!

But as I travelled by train to Holy Island, I also had a sense
of excitement about returning to the Island and my service
at The Open Gate. I realized that my heart is in St. Andrews,
but it is being shaped on Holy Island/Lindisfarne. My time
at The Open Gate on Holy Island is where God is preparing
me for the next phase of my ministry in Scotland. So I trea-
sure this time on Holy Island; it has been such a rich time
for me.

I covet your prayers as I continue on this amazing journey.

Blessings, and all the best to you and yours,

The Rest of the Story

In the last posting I shared about prayer, work, and study
providing the structure of my time here at The Open Gate
on Holy Island /Lindisfarne. After thinking about what I had
written I determined that I needed to add rest to those three.
That is the rest of the story.

After prayer, work, and study all day, as 9:30 pm approach-
es, I realize just how worn out I am. During my stay here this
has happened night after night and week after week. I have
not had any trouble falling asleep. When I wake up in the
morning I feel rested and am eager to carry on with the new
day. I have come to realize just how necessary rest is for me
to pray, work, and study as God would have me do. It is es-
sential for living before the face of God.

The four staff people here at The Open Gate take sabbath
rest seriously. They make sure that I get a day off for ev-
ry six I work, and that we honor the Lord in a special way
on Sunday. We also take rest seriously by taking breaks
during the day, meeting together for hearty meals and ta-
ble talk during the day, and taking naps.

Rest energizes everything else: prayer, work, and study. I
am grateful to the Lord for the rest God gives me.

All the best to you and yours,

Prayer, Work, and Study

The past six weeks here at The Open Gate on Holy Island/
Lindisfrarne have been such a rich time for me. I have de-
veloped a very simple order of life as a result: prayer, work,
and study. I sense that these three daily routines are shap-
ing and forming me for the next stage of my life.

Ordered prayer three times a day adds to my own personal
time of prayer. Every morning at 7:30, Monday through Sat-
urday, I meet with a small group of residents and visiters to
the Island for Morning Prayer at the parish church. We read
through the Psalms, hear Old and New Testament lessons,
and pray for the Church and the World. It is the anchor of
my day, and noontime prayer and night prayer at the Open
Gate are the structure of my day. Three times a week I lead
the prayer services at the Open Gate that combine the anci-
ent faith with contemporary forms of rich Celtic Christian ex-
pressions of that ancient faith.

But hard work fills most of my day. I am realizing how much
prayer and work influence and enrich one another. I spend con-
siderable time setting up and preparing for meals and wash-
ing up after meals. I also spend a lot of time preparing rooms
for arriving guests, changing bed linen, and cleaning toilets and
showers. I also prepare for the three prayers services I lead ev-
ery week at The Open Gate prayer chapels that, as the name
implies, are always open to the public. The work is very hard, and
many nights I feel worn out. But I feel great joy in doing it. It is
a wonderful way to serve other people and Jesus Christ.

It is also important for me to nurture my mind, and so I try to
make time to study in some way. I continue to work hard on
expanding my thesis, but I seek opportunities to read for en-
joyment. I love that, and it refreshes me. I try to make small
times throughout the day to do that. But many times I am too
worn out to do much, so I grab a quick nap or go to bed.

I am experiencing much joy being here and doing what I am do-
ing. I am surprized by joy because I did not anticipate this or
plan for it. It has turned out so much better than I could ever
have imagined.

Continued blessings and peace to you and yours, Jeff T.

The Latest

Not only have I been hardpressed to get online, but it has
been especially difficult for me to do blogging. Only recent-
ly have I found some down time to to read recent emails
and to prepare a blog update.

I continue to be profoundly grateful to the Lord for sending
me here to The Open Gate and Holy Island/Lindisfarne. I
am often busy and wornout, but nothing that a good night's
sleep can't remedy. I continue to be amazed by the Lord's
provision for my needs, frequent divine appointments with
people, nourishing table fellowship with amazing people, the
beauty of God's creation all around me, and witnessing and
experiencing personally God working in the lives of God's
people. I'm glad that I'm able to continue to serve here un-
till the end of August. It has been a precious time for me.

Several weeks ago, the Church of Scotland (C of S) notified
me that I have been authorized to transfer my ordination
from the Presbyterian Church (USA) to the C of S. As I ex-
pected, I will be placed with an established minister for
twelve months in order to become more familiar with the
C of S. During that year I will attend seminars on working
with children and young people, study C of S law, do read-
ing on the history of Christianity in Scotland, and attend
four mini-retreats. I do not yet know where I will be placed
for my twelve month familiarization program. I will receive
a full stipend for the placement with a church.

Although I have not yet been able to do more writing on
my thesis, I have been able to think about a lot of things
while I make beds, wash dishes, and clean toilets. I am
really excited about what I want to write about, and I
am so grateful to the Lord for providing me with another
year to develop my thinking and writing in a greater way.
I am not tired of my thesis; I really desired more time. I
plan to start writing very soon.

All the best to you and yours,

Holy Island/Lindisfarne Update

It is hard to know where to begin sharing with you about
my time here at Holy Island/Lindisfarne. I've now been
on the island for just over two weeks. I am well versed in
the proper way things are done and I have been able to
shape my personal living space in the small trailer next to
the house. I have an increasing sense that God wanted me
here to serve and to be further prepared for what God has
in store for me. At times, especially at night, I feel worn out.
But good times of sleep always seem to restore me day by
day. Just today I have caught up journaling about my first
week here. There were so many people, conversations, and
observations to reflect on and write about. Now that I am
caught up with the journaling, I feel I can move on with my
life.

There are so many things that have touched me: the rous-
ing chorus of birds that awaken me every morning; the
bark of the seals when the sandbar is exposed at low tide;
days of glorious sun with just a touch of chill in the air; un-
expected conversations over a meal that turn out to be sa-
cred moments; being excited to learn that the Boston Cel-
tics won the NBA championship several days after the event;
seeing how quickly meal washing up and room cleaning take
with another pair of hands; the stillness of the air when the
tide changes and the tourists have left the island; and short
naps in the afternoon after all the room cleaning is done.

I'll try to keep you posted in the weeks ahead. But it is hard
for me to get access to a computer.

Blessings, and all the best to you and yours,

A New Era of My Life Begins

I want to give you just a quick update of the last ten days.
I sense that one era of my life has ended and a new era has
just begun. I am excited about how the next period of my
life will slowly blossom.

On Thursday, June 5th, I had two hours of interviews with
representatives of the Church of Scotland about my inten-
tion to transfer my ordination in the Presbyterian Church
(USA) to the Church of Scotland. On June 24th I will be in-
formed by the Ministries Council of their decision whether
I proceed or not with the transfer of ordination.

Friday, June 6th, was a very hard day for me. I said my
goodbyes to so many people, packed up all my belongs
here, and prepared to leave St. Andrews, my home for
over four years. It was a hard day for me, but I got through
it all. I mourned the loss of a very special place full of good
friends, friendly surroundings, and precious memories. I
wondered if I would ever get over the sense of loss of this
very special place.

On Saturday, June 7th, I moved from St. Andrews to Holy
Island/Lindisfarne, a tidal island in the far northeast corner
of England. It was the ancient site of a vibrant missionary
community of women and men of faith that evangelized
the pagan people of Britain from the sixth century to the
tenth. A good friend of mine, a fellow doctoral student,
picked me up at 6am, prepared a wonderful breakfast for
me, and drove me to the train station. From the moment I
got on the train to when I laid my head down on my pillow
to sleep on Holy Island, I was engaged in rich conversations
with special people. I was so wrapped up in listening and
talking that I did not miss St. Andrews. Truly a new era
had begun, and I was eager to get on with it.

The past week has whirred by, and it has been delightful!
I am volunteering at the Open Gate, a Christian B&B on the
island. The staff of three seeks to provide hospitality to up
to ten people a night. I'll write more about them later. The
important thing is that they quickly accepted my offer to
volunteer to help them for at least seven weeks. Hopeful-
ly I can give them eleven weeks. My week was full of cut-
ting vegetables, washing dishes, changing bed linen, doing
laundry, washing dishes, cleaning toilets, preparing rooms
for guests, wahing dishes, putting out seed for the birds,
dusting, preparing coffee and tea, washing dishes, hoover-
ing (in American English, vacuuming), leading evening
prayer, washing dishes, and, over a meal, listening to peo-
ple share from their lives. It wore me out, but it was won-
derful!

Today was my day off-boy, did I need it! I'm back in St. An-
drews for a farewell party. I and the families of five other St.
Mary's PhD students are leaving St. Andrews during June
and July. It was a special time to have fun and say goodbye
to close friends. I am fortunate that I will come back to St.
Andrews every ten days or so. Tomorrow I will return to
Holy Island. It gives me much joy to be there! I will miss
the people here, but it is no longer an aching loss. That is
what being at Holy Island has done for me. I thank the
Lord that I am there!

Blessings, and all the best,

The Great Disruption

It is 11:30 on Friday night. In six and a half hours a good
friend from Seattle, a fellow PhD student, will pick me up,
make me breakfast, and take me to the station to catch the
7:48 train going south. In a little more than two hours later,
I'll be at Holy Island/Lindisfarne. I'll write about what I will
be doing there in the weeks to come.

But right now I'm staring into the face of a great disruption.
I spent most of the day saying my goodbyes to a lot of people.
Most of the goodbyes were short and sweet, but there were
a few that I lingered to chat, putting off a little bit longer the
final packing. I just spent the last few hours packing and put-
ting most of my stuff in storage. So, I'll have stuff in both St.
Andrews and Holy Island.

To say goodbye to people I've cared about, to put my stuff in
storage, and to make a leap into the unknown of living in a new
and different place-all of that makes me feel overwhelmed
with a wave of disruption. I feel like I'm in a free fall and that
at any moment now I will lose it all.

That's when the words of David that I read early this morn-
ing come back to me: "Be strong, and let your heart take
courage, all you who wait for the Lord!" (Ps. 31:24). I take
comfort in those words.

Blessings to you and yours,

An End of an Era

I am grieving an end of an era of my life. Saturday, the day
I leave St. Andrews for Holy Island, is quickly approaching.
How quickly the time has passed has staggered me. It is the
people here that I will miss the most. I am grieving the loss
of them in my life.

I've been going through doing a lot of things here in St. An-
drews for the last time: the last morning prayer, the last Sun-
day church service here, my last day of volunteering at the
Ladyhead Bookshoppe, my last dinner at Dean's Court, the
final home group meeting, the last pancakes and hot choco-
late I have from the North Point...so many things that sup-
ported me and nurtured me over the past four years. That
era of my life is coming to an end the day after tomorrow.

And yet I have glimpses of a new era that is just beginning.
Today I met with Church of Scotland representatives for
interviews. They will let me know of their decision about
the transfer of my ordination on June 24. I felt good about
the interviews, and would hope that there is a place for me
in the Church of Scotland. My time of doing volunteer ser-
vice with The Open Gate on Holy Island is a fitting way to
begin a new era in my life.

I grieve the door of the past four years closing behind me,
but I am becoming more aware of a door opening in front
of me, one brimming with new adventures of a different
sort.

As always, I covet your prayers on my behalf.

Blessings to you and yours,

The Next Step

Finally, I am certain of my next step. Next Saturday, the
seventh of June, I will leave St. Andrews and move to Holy
Island/Lindisfarne. I will be doing some short-term volun-
teer service at the Open Gate, the hospitality house of the
Community of Aidan and Hilda. The latter is a dispersed
Christian community that draws from the rich heritage of
ancient Celtic saints and seeks the renewal of the Chris-
tian Church in Britain in these days.


Ever since I first made contact with the Community in
early 2004, I personally have been renewed by five re-
treats at the Open Gate. So it is a thrill for me to serve
where I have been truly blessed and nurtured in my life
in Jesus. I have informed the small staff that I promise to
be there June and July, and I hope I can do longer. They
will have me preparing rooms for guests, cleaning toilets,
changing bed sheets, doing meal preparation, and being
available to help in any way people who stop by. I will be
working with a hostess and a couple who are the wardens.
For more information on the Open Gate and the Commun-
ity, see their website: < http://www.aidanandhilda.org/>.


Holy Island/Lindisfarne is a tidal island on the east coast
of England, just below the Scottish-English border. There
is a causeway between the island and the mainland that
is open for roughly six hours two times during every 24-
hour period. It has become a place of modern-day Chris-
tian pilgrimage because Christianity was brought by mis-
sionary monks from Iona to the island in northern Eng-
land in the sixth century. During the second half of the Sec-
ond millennium many Celtic Christian women and men
ministered from there, taking the Gospel all over Scotland,
England, and Wales. So, it really is a holy place. Further-
more, it has gained a reputation as a place to watch birds.
It truly is a great place to be.

Volunteering with the Open Gate is a great way for me to
make the best use of my time while I wait to see what will
happen with me and the Church of Scotland. . I have a signi-
ficant interview with the Church of Scotland next week. I
hope I can gain a better sense of what lies in store for me
as I continue in the process. I have no idea what the next
few months will be like or where I will be. But at least I
know what my next step is, and that means a lot to me. I
want to be active in a ministry while I wait. There is the ad-
ded benefit that I won't have to pay for housing or food be-
cause the Open Gate will provide that for me. Plus Holy Is-
land will be a great environment to work on my thesis. I am
ever more grateful that I have more time to work on it. I
have ideas pouring into my mind. It is fun!


I am enjoying how my summer is shaping up during this
transition time from university research to parish ministry.
A week ago I was anxious about my immediate future; I did
not see anything taking shape. But now I am taking my first
step. As always, I covet your prayers.


All the best, and blessings to you and yours,

Failures, Disappointments, and Challenges

I've been thinking a lot about the failures, disappointments,
and challenges that I've experienced over the course of my
life. My experiencing them has contributed to my growth as
a Christian man. Although it would be a stretch to consider
the viva result a failure, it was a disappointment and a chal-
lenge after all the time and work I've spent here in St. An-
drews. But the disappointment and the challenges have
only motivated me to grow deeper in both heart and mind.

I have heard it said that championship athletic teams be-
come better through losses; that successful business man-
agers learn from business failures; that the most gifted
writers often have seasons of their labor being rejected for
publication; and that life's most glorious times often come
out of the darkest moments. I cannot say that I interpret
the viva results as a great loss, a failure, a rejection, or a
dark night of my soul. Nor is it a disappointment that will
get me down and depressed. Rather I see it as a challenge
to use up to a year to interact more with Orlando Costas
whom I spent so much time researching. The interaction
with his theology of mission is what I sensed I needed to
do, but had not done by the time my academically allotted
time ran out. Now I do have that official time to do what I
need and want to do.

I must admit that I do feel wounded. But also I have heard
it said that woundedness yields godly character, especially
wisdom. That is what I most desire. May it be so.

As always, I covet your prayers. Blessings to you and
yours,

Hey, Hey, I Really Am OK! Eh?

The Canadians have a wonderful way of employing 'eh'
with just the right tone and timing when talking. The
Scots also have their own distinct way of using 'aye' in
their speech. The desired response by the hearer of
said 'eh' or 'aye' is to trust what the speaker has just
said. When I employ 'eh' (I couild have used 'aye') in
the title above, I am asking you, dear reader, to trust
me when I state that I am OK with the results of the
viva. In fact, I welcome the opportunity to continue to
work on my thesis for a bit longer.

I am not mentally quick; I ponder, wrestle, labor, and
struggle to think well. I have never learned things quick-
ly, and so I rarely do things right the first few times. In
terms of mental activity I am a tortoise, and not a hare;
a hotair balloon, and not a jet airplane; a crockpot, and
not a microwave oven. I hope I am more like an aged
fine wine one savors with a good meal than instant cof-
fee gulped down in the morning. I remember times long
ago when l would race ahead of my mother and look way
back to see her slowly making her way to our common
destination. Well, my thinking is like my mother's walk-
ing: sooner or later my thinking gets me to the desired
location.

Even though I feel disappointed about the outcome
of the viva, and because I am a crockpot-type think-
er, I actually welcome the opportunity to do some
more work on my thesis for re-submission. My the-
sis is like a good meal in the crockpot that smells
ready to eat. However, after having tasted it, I rea-
lize it still needs a little more time in the crockpot.
But boy, do I look forward to enjoying it when it
has cooked a bit longer. All the ingredients are
there; it is just going to need a little more time in
the crockpot.

Having the degree of PhD is not as important to me
as having had the chance to study and reflect on Or-
lando Costas, the topic of my research. I am appre-
ciative that my two readers maintained high stan-
dards and did not just wave my thesis through.
Their comments were useful and challenging. Be-
cause of that I hope to have a much better thesis
to resubmit.

Blessings to you and yours, the Crackpot Crockpot

Today's the Day!

Today is the day of my viva, and I am ready to get on with
it! I have spent the last ten days preparing for this day after
not having touched the thesis since it was submitted in Jan-
uary. I look forward to critical feedback on what I worked
hard on for four years. I am eager to get into the viva.

I had a good rest last night and woke up refreshed. Soon I
will head off to Morning Prayer at the University Chapel,
and then go for a walk along the North Sea, have pancakes
and hot chocolate at the North Point (a hangout of mine),
and then probably take a little nap. I don't know what
I'll do yet after that. The viva is scheduled for 2:30. I'll
try to remember to post the outcome of the viva some
time tonight.

All the best,

It's Time for Viva Time!

Well, in less than 24 hours I will have gone through my viva
and heard the outcome of the oral defense of my thesis. I am
experiencing a great sense of peace that will abide with me re-
gardless of the outcome of the defense. If there are things I
still need to work on, I want to hear it; if my thesis stands up
to the panel, I want to hear the affirmation. Regardless of what
happens, I believe I win both ways.

I have been learning a lot reading my thesis through several
times and I am making new connections as a result. I worked
hard on the thesis for four years and received the word from
my supervisor to submit it. I really enjoy reading my thesis
and I look forward to the viva tomorrow. I actually hope to
have some fun during it. I want to discuss my argument with
two scholars whom I respect. There are times when I feel
like my stomach is in my throat; but most of the time I am
eager to be in the viva discussing what has become very im-
portant to me.

So, Wednesday, the 14th of May, at 2:30, is a date and a
time I will long remember.

All the best to you and yours,