Under Orders: Standing Down Again

Recently I was disappointed when the Member of Parliament who was advo-
cating for me informed me that her efforts to reverse my visa refusal to return
to Scotland had not been successful. I had guarded my expectations, but still
I had hoped that she would be successful. She promised to try one other ave-
nue, so there is still some hope. But I don't  expect to return to parish ministry
in St. Fergus, Scotland, until early next spring. I must admit that I felt let down
and disappointed.

Last April I was invited to attend a four day Christian Leaders' Prayer Summit
on the Oregon Coast. There were twenty-three of us there and on the first night
we each had an opportunity to share what was happening to us. I told them about
my situation and the first visa refusal. The next afternoon one of the women lead-
ers said she had a word for me. She saw me in a dugout at a baseball game. I was
all alone at the far end of the bench watching my teammates playing ball out on
the field.

She knew I was a talented player and that I loved my teammates and the game.
It was very evident how much I wanted to be out on the field and in the game.  
Then she saw the coach come over to me and sit down right beside me. She
looked closer and recognized that the coach was Jesus. Jesus then began to
teach me how he placed the players and what he did in certain situations. He
commented on the batters from the other team and what to do when batters
got on base. One of my colleagues at the the Summit piped up that the best
coaches made it a habit of listening and learning. Their words struck deeply
into my heart and encouraged me.

I love Jesus and I marvel at the way he is building his kingdom. I only do as I
am ordered by him; I am under orders. But I wanted Jesus to send me out onto
the field so that I could play the game with my teammates. It seems that for the
last five years, I have been sitting on the bench and out of the game. I have ex-
perienced setbacks, disappointments, and challenges that have knocked the stuf-
fing out of me. There were several times when things seemed to be opening up
for me, but quickly disappeared. But I know for certain that I have been called
to minister at St. Fergus Parish Church. Nothing will deter me from serving the
people there as their minister.

Since the Prayer Summit in April, I have experienced a change in my atti-
tude. I see my extended stay here in the Longview/Kelso area as a time of
blessing rather than a negative ordeal to go through. It all seems infused
with a sense of God's wise love for me. I have developed a whole new set
of relationships in the area. I always seem to have something to do or some
place to go and I often yearn for free time when I have nothing that I need
to do. My relationship with the Lord and my knowledge of myself have
never been better. I feel like I have moved up to a new spiritual level that I
had never reached until now. I believe that this time here at home is a divine
appointment meant to prepare me for pastoral ministry at St. Fergus Parish
Church. I feel myself royally blessed by God.

As always, I covet you prayers.

Blessing to you and yours,