Still Learning to Rest

Four weeks ago I was feeling pretty worn out. Advent and Christmas week sucked the energy
out of me. A heavy theological conference, two funerals, and a rush to prepare a Sunday ser-
vice drained even more energy out of me. I really needed time off, but somehow it is difficult
for me to set down my activities and ministry. Three Mondays ago and several days after that,
I finally did it. And, boy, was it ever good. I just laid low at home.

When I have had time off before, I had a tendency to plan trips and explorations to places far
away. It takes time and energy to plan these jaunts and to actually do them. The result is that I
am usually in need of a real holiday when I come back. I am also confronted by a pile of mail
and emails that was thrown on top of a huge pile of mail I had neglected over the past two or
three months. This time I just decided to stay home and do what I wanted to do.

I just took it easy. I most enjoyed reading Scripture and praying, followed by times of journal-
ing. I read and finished one book that I had struggled to find time to read. I went to the BBC
iPlayer to watch wonderful shows on great British Railway journeys and 20th century world
history. I enjoyed taking a nap every day. I did not have any interruptions that took away from
my time off.

I did not do anything that substantially contributed to ministry in St Fergus, yet the time off was
vital to my well-being, my walk with Christ, and my service to our Lord and his kingdom. I strug-
gle to rest, especially to rest in the Lord Jesus. It is difficult for me refrain from doing something;
thus I neglect my relationship with God. It is a fundamental issue of my life. Even though I bold-
ly profess that I am saved by grace through faith, I live as it it all depends on my works and ef-
forts. That is wrong; it is sin. I have to keep re-learning that lively faith focuses on what God has
done through the cross and resurrection of Jesus Christ, not on anything I do. Yet I need to learn
that God has redeemed me in Jesus to do good works that God planned for us. I ask for your
prayers as I seek to take this to heart and live it out.

Blessings to you and yours,