Community, Marriage, and Kids: Signs of Life

One thing that I will always cherish about my time at the Universi-

ty of St. Andrews is my experience of community among the Divin-
ity postgraduate students and their families.Before I arrived in St.
Andrews, I expected that I would be alone, isolated, and complete-
ly absorbed in my research.

But it has not been like that at all. Not only have I been enriched
by the women and men who were my fellow doctoral students,but
I have been blessed by their husbands or wives, and children. I
do not think that I would have recovered so well from my heart
surgery two and a half years ago if I had not had the support of
this community. I am so grateful to the Lord for bringing them in-
to my life the past five years. They (as well as others from through-
out my life) have enriched me in so many ways.

In this small community of expat postgraduate students and their

families I have also witnessed husbands and wives who take their
marital vows seriously and who make living out those vows a pri-
ority in their lives together. This is done in the face of great aca-
demic pressure. In spite of the vast majority of my colleagues be-
ing married, I have been affirmed in my singleness. I only hope
that my singleness encourages other singles and affirms the rela-
tionships of those who are married.

It thrills my heart to see couples taking marriage seriously, espe-
cially n the Western world where marriage is rarely respected or
affirmed. In the face of this tragic degradation of marriage stands
the uplifting of the beauty of marriage. It reflects the way that
God created women and men for one another.

But what strikes me most is the explosive number of births of chil-
dren among University postgrad families, especially those from the
US and Canada. I have seen so many couples come here without
children and leave with at least the firstborn and one completed
doctoral thesis. Others return to the US with one or two more chil-
dren than when they first came to St. Andrews.

Earlier in the month a group of St. Mary's Postgraduate families
and friends gathered together to say farewell to a family return-
ing to Arizona. I was amazed at the presence of two newborns, one
infant less than a year old, and a large group of children bouncing
off the walls and running and screaming outside on the lawn.

Also attending the farewell gathering was a friend, a PhD student
in Old Testament studies, who was there with her husband. She
looked as if she would give birth to her firstborn well before deliv-
ering her doctoral thesis to the university. I was reminded of how
much life there is in this community at the university. I have missed
seeing that ever since I left St. Andrews nearly a year ago. It stands
in sharp contrast to the larger society that does not tend to value
children and family.

I firmly believe that life in community, the quality of marriages, and
the abundance of children are signs of new life that only Jesus Christ
can give. In a truly dark world, only Jesus brings life and light.

Blessings and all the best to you and yours,

Regaining My Confidence Upfront

When I came to Cupar Old Parish Church in November of
last year, it had been over five years since I had preached
or led a worship service. I was pretty rusty the first couple
of months, especially when I preached. But my confidence
has been coming back, especially with leading portions of
the service. I'm making good headway with my preaching,
but still have a lot to work on.

I spend considerable time preparing for either the opening
prayers of adoration and confession in the first part of the
service or the prayers of thanksgiving and intercession in
the second part of the service. It includes choosing several
hymns or praise and worship songs. People seem to like
my style.

I often do the childrens' address in the first half of the serv-
ice and spend a good amount of time preparing for them. I
have done hundreds of childrens' addresses since the mid-
1970s, but they are always a challenge. I enjoy using my
imagination to craft an address that kids will listen to. I al-
ways feel good when there are children who repeat back to
me the main message. I am amazed at how many adults talk
about the childrens' addresses. I wish they would talk about
the sermons that way. Maybe there is something to be learned
here about the way we preach.

Last Sunday I shared with the kids that there is a God, that
God is good, and that God loves them. After the service an
excited mum ran up to me and shared that her eight-year-old o
son had told her in the car coming to church that he did not
believe there was a God and that there is nothing after death.
I was astonished that a boy his age would be thinking that
deeply. She was almost giddy that the childrens' address
seemed to have spoken directly to him. She said he was really
quiet when he came back to where he had been sitting. The
mother was so excited.

I'm preaching every two weeks at either the morning service
or bi-weekly evening service. I sense there is still a lot of work
to be done with my preaching. But I have been receiving good
feedback from people that has encouraged me. I have been en-
joying using my imagination as I prepare to preach. I was heart-
ened last Sunday when I greeted a church regular. She asked
if I was preaching that morning. When I told her I was not, she
responded that it was a pity that I was not. That made my day.

All the best to you and yours,

Sitting, Sipping a Dram, and Listening

One of the joys of my twelve month familiarization placement at
Cupar Old Parish Church in Cupar, Scotland, is visiting people in
their homes. The minister of Cupar Old has given me the names
and addresses of 117 people to visit during the course of my time
here. So far I've done over forty visits. They are usually widows
or widowers, and in their 70s or 80s. I have visited a few in their
90s. The vast majority are women, with only a handful of men.
Generally they are members of the church, but attend only on
the four communion Sundays per year.

I was advised to do my visits cold turkey; in other words, I don't
phone ahead. I just knock on the door. But in many cases, the chal-
lenge has been to even find the door. Rather than numbered street
addresses, many of the older residences only have place names such
as 'Moatview', 'Hillside', 'Rosewood Cottage', and 'Farlie Cottage'. It
has often taken me a bit of time to find them only to find that the per-
son was not in. But at least I knew then where that person lived.

I always wear a clerical collar when I make my visits. When a per-
son comes to the door I introduce myself as 'Reverend Jeff Tipp-
ner from Cupar Old', and then give them my card. Two women
didn't want a visit and one woman seemed to freak out on seeing
me. In those cases I just move on to another visit. But most of the
time I am invited in and given hospitality. People often offer me
tea or coffee. I usually ask for a tea, and especially enjoy it when
they offer a plate of 'biscuits' (cookies). The other day a kindly 90-
year old gentleman offered me a 'dram' of whiskey. Even though I
don't fancy whiskey, the way he asked me gave me the impression
that it would have been unacceptable to refuse. I guess I passed the
test because we got along quite well. He told me he made the drink
half whiskey and half water. I sipped it and rather enjoyed it. It was
a first for me. I'm sorry whiskey fans.

I guess there is a buzz around town that Cupar Old has its very
own American minister! So I play it for all it's worth. At the be-
ginning of a visit they are often very interested in me. So I tell
them a lot about myself. But most of the time they soon feel
comfortable enough to share about themselves. So I sit and lis-
ten; sometimes for twenty minutes or so, and sometimes for an
hour or more. It is a privilege to hear them share.

One gentleman shared with me about surprizing his mum in Aber-
deen in early May, 1945, the last week of World War II in Europe.
He had been captured by the Germans just before he could be evac-
uated from Dunkirk in 1940. He spent the duration of the war as a
Prisoner of War in Germany. The people I've visited have told me
wonderful stories from their lives, showed me pictures of grand- and
great grandchildren, shared their pain of sons and daughters cutting
off all communication with them, and told about life in Cupar in days
long pass. I sit and listen, and let them determine how long I stay. It
is always a privilege to be with them.

I sense that some of them are well supported by family and
friends. For others I make a note to drop by again in a month or
two to check in with them. It has been a wonderful experience for
me.

Blessings, and all the best to you and yours,

Living in Scotland and the Issue of Tea

The meaning of 'tea' is often very confusing to me and many other
North Americans living over here in Great Britain, especially for
those of us who relate to mixed groups of Scots and the English. I
will write more about the Brits in a later blog. But now I want to
focus on the issue of tea.

In St. Andrews, especially at the University, there are two main
groups: the English and the Scottish people. Both are considered
British. (North Americans form one of the largest groups as well).
A big problem for me is what each group means by 'tea.' To North
Americans, 'tea' is a hot drink along with coffee and hot chocolate.
(I prefer hot chocolate, but if not offered, chose tea over coffee).
So when I was volunteering at a Christian retreat center in Eng-
gland last summer, tea was offered after dinner.

My problem came in November when I moved to Cupar, a very
Scottish town. I was often asked if I had my tea yet. Even cats
have 'tea' set out for them in the early evening. After many funer-
als there is usually a 'funeral tea." In most Scottish contexts, it re-
fers to a substantial meal in the late afternoon or early evening. I
rather enjoy being invited over for tea.

The problem is for a North American such as myself to determine
whether I am being invited to a tea in the English sense of the
word or in the Scottish sense. Earlier on when I was newer in Scot-
land I misinterpreted the invitation for tea. There were times when
I did not eat before hand, went to a tea expecting to eat well, and
had to eat a lot of biscuits with my tea to quell a growling stomach.
There were other times when I ate before the tea, and found a mag-
ficent spread of food upon my arrival. Such is life.

Blessings and all the best to you and yours,

Preaching Again

Yesterday, Sunday, March 1st, I preached from Mark 1:9-15 at Cupar
Old Parish Church. It was the first Sunday of Lent and I sought to en-
courage people to keep their eyes on Jesus during the forty days until
Good Friday and Easter Sunday. I compared the Christian life with go-
ing to a ceilidh, a Scottish dance. I likened Jesus coming to be baptized
with Jesus coming onto the dance floor to do a Scottish Sword Dance.
It turned out to be a very meaningful image for people in the congrega-
tion. I was struck by the power of imagination to strike a chord in peo-
ples' hearts. I received considerable positive feedback from people.

On Sunday I felt confident and comfortable up in the pulpit. I sensed it
coming two weeks ago when I preached from Malachi 4. But last Sun-
day I felt confident enough to refrain from relying on reading from my
sermon manscript, but keeping steady eye contact with the congrega-
tion. It was a big step for me. Until midNovember of last year, I really
hadn't preached a real sermon since August, 2003, when I was in
South Dakota. I had grown rusty when it came to preaching. I can feel
that it is all starting to come back to me now. I'm looking forward to
preaching every two weeks during my placement here at Cupar Old.

Blessings to you and yours,